Not the worst day ever, but not the best. Eric says he didn't sleep well again last night. While overall, he's improving, he still struggles so much. He has so many secretions and needs to be suctioned often. He has a really difficult time with trach care because it makes him cough and gag so much. Today, he has no motivation to do anything but watch cartoons. When PT/OT came, he obliged and sat in the chair for awhile, but it was tough for him. He got really short of breath. He doesn't want to eat or drink anything, and we're trying to progress him to solid food. He'll eat pureed fruit, applesauce, yogurt, juices, but only a few bites or drinks of each. This is all new to his stomach. He's been getting NG tube feedings all along, but he hadn't eaten real food in a month.
Lately, I find myself asking "Why?" Why did this have to happen, why does he have to suffer like this, why is it taking so long for him to get better? When this little 3-letter word creeps into my head, I try to remember that there are over 400 beds in this hospital, all filled with kids who have parents who are likely asking the same question. We're not alone.
To all my friends who smoke, come sit with Eric for a day and it will be obvious. You won't want to continue in a habit that likely will cause you to be chronically short of breath. It's a miserable way to live. Eric never had a choice. You do.
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6 comments:
Oh, Angie, I'm so sorry for his struggle. I pray he wakes up one day and his struggles will be over; that he starts eating and progressing and there will be no answer for it...just like there's no answer to why this all happened. I wish I could make everything better for all of you. I'm praying and I still believe God is answering our prayers. Eric has come a long way... I realize there's still a long way to go but I'm praising God for every ounce of improvement. I know you are too. I feel so sad when I hear discouragement in your posts...or when you tell us Eric is discouraged. But I thank God you're so generous with your updates and details. I'd go bonkers not knowing. :(
Father, thank You that You are still at work in Eric's body healing and restoring his lungs. Thank You that the joy that is his strength is bubbling out of his inner being and filling the atmosphere around him. Every person that comes into his presence is affected by it. I pray Lord that Eric has a very peaceful sleep tonight and he awakes tomorrow feeling better than he has in a long time. Thank You for complete restoration of his lungs in Jesus name I pray. Amen.
There are better days ahead for you Eric. Just keep believing. Don't Give up!
WHEN I READ YOUR UPDATES EVERYDAY I PRAISE GOD THAT ERIC HAS COME SO FAR SINCE LAKE CHARLES. IT IS ONLY HUMAN FOR YOU TO ASK WHY AND GOD UNDERSTANDS. YOU ARE A MOTHER WHO LOVES HER SON JUST AS HE LOVED HIS SON.ERIC IS A STRONG YOUNG MAN BUT HE HAS DOWN DAYS JUST AS THE REST OF US DO.HE'S HAD A LONG ORDEAL TO GO THROUGH BUT HE WILL COME THROUGH.SOMEONE ONCE TOLD ME WHEN OUR FAMILY WAS GOING THROUGH A TRAGEDY THAT WHEN WE CRY OR FEEL DOWN THAT GOD IS RIGHT THERE WITH YOU FEELING WHAT YOU FEEL.PRAISE GOD.LOVE TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.
JOAN
Ang, we're still praying for you guys. Please know how much we love you all and we wish we could do something for you.
Do you have an e-mail address where I can e-mail you???
For anyone who prefers to send an email rather than a blog comment, my address is angiedilmore@gmail.com
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