So, we returned yesterday from Dallas after
depositing son number two (he’s six minutes younger) at the University of Texas
at Dallas. We took his brother to Southeastern Louisiana University the week
prior. And suddenly, after 18+ years of raising our twin sons, we are the
proverbial empty-nesters.
I remember the day Bob and I brought the boys home
from the hospital. We set them on the floor of the living room in their little
car seats. We sat on the couch and looked at these two newborns. And we felt an
overwhelming sense of Okay, what do we do
now? If my mom hadn't been there to help, we might still be sitting on that
couch, trying to figure out this parenting thing.
Returning home from Dallas was a similar emotion. We
walked into the house. The empty house. And we wondered – What do we do?
“Just you and me now, babe.”
“Yep, that’s it.”
The boys have become young adults. Our job as
parents is essentially over. Did we teach them enough? Did we love and nurture
enough? Can we remember how to simply be spouses, without the parental component?
What do we do now?
Well, we’re not going to Disney World. But we are
excited about the prospect of having the time to travel, explore, and discover
-- just the two of us. We’re looking forward to all sorts of outings, weekend trips,
vacations, and sailing excursions.
There’s no doubt about it. We’re going to miss those
boys like crazy. Thanksgiving can’t come fast enough. It’s an uncertain time of
transition at our house. I’m not sure yet how I feel about it. There’s a
bittersweet mix of sadness and excitement. I don’t know exactly what it looks
like, but knowing Bob and me, whatever we do, it will be an adventure.
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2 comments:
I wrestle with how conventional wisdom for us "empty nesters" (of course I swore I'd never be one) is to get a life. I have a life, often feel like I'm living three or four lives. I have friends galore, hobbies and activities I adore and a successful career I love. What do women like me do? I guess I'll be figuring it out!
Lora, I agree. Parents need a life separate from their children, even when the children are growing up, so they're not so blind-sided when the kids spread their wings and fly. It is those parents whose whole world revolves around their children who have the hardest time. Like you, I have plenty to keep me busy.
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